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Daring Greatly

Overview

Three-Sentence Summary

Extended Summary

"Daring Greatly" by Brené Brown is an insightful book that delves into the concept of vulnerability and how embracing it can lead to a more fulfilled life. The author uses her academic research on shame, fear, and vulnerability to debunk societal myths around these emotions as weaknesses. Instead, she positions them as essential elements for building strong connections, fostering creativity, achieving professional success, and enhancing personal growth.

Brown argues that by acknowledging our vulnerabilities rather than hiding or disregarding them, we allow ourselves to take risks and face challenges with authenticity. She emphasizes the power of vulnerability in creating meaningful relationships and fostering genuine connections with others.

Brown also provides practical strategies for combating societal pressures which often discourage us from showing our innate vulnerabilities. This includes developing self-awareness about our fears and insecurities, cultivating a sense of worthiness despite imperfections, practicing gratitude for small victories, embracing joy even amidst struggles, finding the courage to be imperfect among others.

Key Points

Who Should Read

About the Author

Brené Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston Graduate College of Social Work. She has spent more than a decade studying vulnerability, courage, authenticity, and shame. She is the author of several best-selling books and her TED talk "The Power of Vulnerability" is one of the most viewed talks on TED.com.

Further Reading

Readwise Highlights

“I know that I’m onto something when folks look away, quickly cover their faces with their hands, or respond with “ouch,” “shut up,” or “get out of my head” The last is normally how people respond when they hear or see the phrase: Never ______ enough. It only takes a few seconds before people fill in the blanks with their own tapes:

Never good enough. Never perfect enough. Never thin enough. Never powerful enough. Never successful enough. Never smart enough. Never certain enough. Never safe enough. Never extraordinary enough.

We get scarcity because we live it. One of my very favorite writers on scarcity is global activist and fund-raiser Lynne Twist. In her book The Soul of Money, she refers to scarcity as “the great lie.” She writes:

For me, and for many of us, our first waking thought of the day is “I didn’t get enough sleep.” The next one is “I don’t have enough time.” Whether true or not, that thought of not enough occurs to us automatically before we even think to question or examine it. We spend most of the hours and the days of our lives hearing, explaining, complaining, or worrying about what we don’t have enough of... Before we even sit up in bed, before our feet touch the floor, we’re already inadequate, already behind, already losing, already lacking something. And by the time we go to bed at night, our minds are racing with a litany of what we didn’t get, or didn’t get done, that day...

Scarcity is the “never enough” problem...

Scarcity thrives in a culture where everyone is hyperaware of lack. Everything from safety and love to money and resources feels restricted or lacking...

What makes this constant assessing and comparing so self-defeating is that we are often comparing our lives, our marriages, our families, and our communities to unattainable, media-driven visions of perfection, or we’re holding up our reality against our own fictional account of how great someone else has it. Nostalgia is also a dangerous form of comparison. Think about how often we compare ourselves and our lives to a memory that nostalgia has so completely edited that it never really existed: “Remember when...? Those were the days...”...

The feeling of scarcity thrives in shame-prone cultures that are deeply steeped in comparison and fractured by disengagement.

Three Forms of Scarcity, p28

  1. Shame

“Shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.”

  1. Comparison

“Healthy competition can be beneficial, but is there constant overt or covert comparing and ranking? Has creativity been suffocated? Are people held to one narrow standard, rather than acknowledged for their unique gifts and contributions? Is there an ideal way of being or one form of talent that is used as measurement of everyone else’s worth?”

  1. Disengagement (or Disconnection)

“Are people afraid to take risks or try new things? Is it easier to stay quiet than to share stories, experiences, and ideas? Does it feel as if no one is really paying attention or listening? Is everyone struggling to be seen and heard?"